I always dreamt of having a huge wedding. I wanted hundreds of our family members and friends, sparklers, fog machines, champagne, and a Rolls Royce for a getaway car. Then, I actually got engaged and realized how expensive weddings were. My fiancé and I have been engaged since March of 2021, but I was still in nursing school and didn’t really have the time to dive into planning. After graduation, I had finally picked out a date and venue, but then realized I also needed a DJ, officiant, photographer, florist, caterer, coordinator, rental house for the bridal party, décor, goodie bags… I totally underestimated what we were going to spend and how many items I had left to go on my To Do list.
We had a long talk one night discussing budgets, our future goals, and our expectations for our wedding day and we had the crazy idea of planning a small wedding soon. We didn’t anticipate only having 50 days to plan it, but we knew what we wanted and figured why not try! I wasn’t quite sure that we could pull it off, but here we are, doing the dang thing. (Pro tip: WEDDINGS DON’T HAVE TO COMPLICATED AND EXPENSIVE!) My fiancé and I tend to keep to ourselves and we don’t love huge crowds unless it’s a country concert, lol. We realized that we would rather have a small ceremony with our best friends and parents than invite people that we haven’t talked to in the last five years just for the hell of it. Our family and friends are the most important people in our lives and we wanted to make sure that we could spend our wedding day with them without the stress of being rushed to say hi to hundreds of other people. We truly want to enjoy our day.
I decided to gather up the “must do” items of wedding planning and share them with other couples who are thinking of planning a wedding in a short amount of time. Obviously, everyone has their own expectations and visions of what they want their wedding to look like, so this plan may not necessarily work for you, but I feel like it serves as a good starting point, no matter what your time frame may be.
Determine your guest list. Do you want a ton of people, just you and your partner, your families? I suggest making a spreadsheet and typing out everyone’s names so that you can see the total number of people on your list. Then, comb through the names. Do you really need to invite _____? Will it stress you out if ______ shows up? Are you worried about _______ and _______ being in the same room? Will ______ only have negative things to say? This is YOUR day, and Like Marie Kondo says, if they don’t bring you joy… you know the rest. We are very close with our immediate families and our best friends, so we decided to keep it small and only invite them for our ceremony and dinner. (Our definitions of small may be different, but we will have a maximum of 45 guests, including ourselves.)
Pick a ceremony site. Do you always spend your weekends at a local park? Do you love the beach? Do you want to get married at a church? Do you have plans of getting married on family property? This part can be a little tricky, trying to narrow down your options. We decided on a local waterfront location that has public access and no need for any permits. We looked at a few beach locations but some required all of our guests to pay, some needed an event permit application 90 days in advance, and some needed an application just to be able to take photographs and they limited the types of cameras you could use. It got a little intense trying to research these, but once we found one that was free, easy to access, and had a great look for pictures, we knew that would be our site. We chose our location before we decided on the date so that we could go through the local calendar and see if there were any public events going on that we would need to work around.
Pick a date. Some couples choose a date that has a special meaning or significance. We chose our date because we’re both starting new jobs and this date fell during a time where we would both have a weekend off and wouldn’t be required to take time off. We’re planning on taking our honeymoon later in the year anyways, so we weren’t too concerned about the date we chose.
Find an officiant. Luckily, one our closest friends has officiated several weddings and is able to do this for us. We’re super excited because who can say that they were married by one of their best friends? Not very many people! If you don’t know anyone who can officiate a ceremony, don’t freak out. A quick online search will give you tons of results. You can even join some wedding groups on Facebook and read reviews directly from other brides to find someone who will match your style and write a ceremony tailored to your relationship. You have endless options for your ceremony, it can be religious, nonreligious, short and sweet, an hour long, etc.
Choose your décor, if any. We decided that we didn’t want to worry about setting up fancy décor for our wedding, we would rather just use the nature surrounding our ceremony site. The only type of décor that we are using are our bouquets and boutonnieres, which I’m making on my own. If you plan on making your own florals as well, I suggest looking online for ideas. I searched my theme on Pinterest and found so many cute floral arrangements! I'm using neutral colors and was able to find a great selection of dried florals, wood flowers, and pampas grass from Hobby Lobby. Hobby Lobby has a rotating schedule for sales on wedding decorations and florals, so if you want to save a few dollars, definitely check them out. At first, I was against the artificial flowers because I thought they all looked too fake, but I was pleasantly surprised to see how much they have been upgraded.
Will you have a bridal party? Although our wedding is small, we still wanted to incorporate the traditional bridal party aspect, along with a flower girl and ring bearer. I feel like since we aren’t doing the typical décor, having a bridal party in coordinating colors will help tie everything together.
Pick a photographer. This one may be tricky since photographers are often booked well in advance. You will also need to determine a budget as prices vary widely depending on skill, equipment, the hours needed, etc. Keep in mind that all photographers edit their pictures differently and that can affect how some of your colors look in the finished photographs. Don’t be shy, tell the photographer exactly what you are looking for, this will make your day (and their day) so much easier! I also suggest joining some wedding groups on Facebook for this, because you'll be able to read real reviews and see so many different styles of photographs.
Opt for a private dinner instead of a full-blown reception. (Again, if you really want a reception, I’m sure you can find a venue but keep in mind that they are often expensive and require the full price to be paid roughly 30 days before the event. Again, like photographers, reception venues are often booked a year in advance so it may be difficult to find one and get it booked within 50 days.) Since we didn’t want to stress over finding a budget-friendly reception hall, then having to find a DJ and more decorations, we decided to rent a private event room at a local restaurant. This allows for us to spend quality time with each of our guests and enjoy a relaxed environment. I’m not super picky with food, so I asked my fiancé to give me some restaurant ideas and then I reached out for more information from each of them. We took into account the number of guests that the private rooms can hold, the pricing per guest, and which food options would be made available for us. After finalizing our guest list, we decided which restaurant would suit us the best. We were able to select three options for our guests, as well as salads and appetizers. There are options to include alcohol, but we decided it would be best to leave that cost to the guests, if they choose to order that. Since we aren’t having a true reception, and only inviting our family and closest friends to the ceremony and dinner, we also decided that we would go to a local country bar for drinks and invite anyone who wants to celebrate with us, after the dinner. Thankfully, the bar has a large dance floor and is being kind enough to clear everyone off the floor to let us have our first dance. I figured since we are doing a dinner instead of a reception, this would allow us to still have a first dance and make it unique like the rest of our day.
Go digital! Save The Dates and invitations are an expense that adds up quickly in wedding planning. Since we’re doing everything in 50 days and shipping times are still up in the air, I designed our save the dates and invitations on Canva, then texted them to each of our guests. Now, they have all of the information they need on their phone, we don’t have to worry about anyone losing their invitation or accidentally throwing it away. They have tons of free designs and you can edit just about everything to fit your theme and colors. Sometimes the desktop website can be tricky, but you can access the templates through their app on your cellphone or tablet, which is so convenient. If you want physical invitations, there are printing options available through Canva, or you can download your design and have it printed at a local office supply store. I'll share what our Save The Dates and invitations look like below, however I did remove the exact location for privacy.
As I mentioned above, I used Canva to create these, and the process was super easy. I was able to choose my colors, change the fonts, and add in pictures. Just be sure to save the file as a JPG or JPEG, or screenshot it if you are wanting to upload it as a picture online. (If you need help with this part, graphic design is one of my favorite hobbies and I would LOVE to give you a hand!)
Outfits! Since we’re getting married outside near the water, I felt that a traditional wedding dress would be way too much for the relaxed boho look I was going for. Instead, I searched online and read tons of reviews on websites to make sure I would find something that would arrive in time. I finally landed on Baltic Born, a super cute, boho style, but still affordable site. My bridesmaids, flower girl, and bonus mom are also ordering their dresses from this site. They have tons of options, but my favorite was the Wedding Collection because it categorizes dresses by color and makes it easier to shop. All of my bridesmaids will be in the same color but I had them each choose their own dress to make sure they would be comfortable and feel good about themselves. Nothing against weddings where everyone matches, but one dress doesn’t always suit each individual’s body shape. Be sure to keep an eye out on this website because they often run flash sales and email you discount codes, and some dresses sell out quickly! They also offer free returns for store credit in the United States. My fiancé already has his suit picked out, and we decided that the groomsmen would wear navy dress pants, a white button up, brown shoes and a brown belt. Nothing too complicated. (Please keep in mind that I have had a Pinterest board with wedding ideas for longer than I would like to admit, so I had already decided on a theme and color scheme for outfits before we started actually planning our wedding.)
Registries! Since my fiancé and I have lived together for a few years, we didn’t find it necessary to create a registry since we already have a home and thankfully have everything we need. Instead, we are requesting money for our honeymoon fund. We felt that this was a better option since we already own the typical things are put on a registry and some stores have difficult exchange/return policies. If you do want to create a registry, I have heard tons of great things about the online registries with Amazon, Target, and Bed Bath & Beyond. Unfortunately, I can’t really give any advice on those since we aren’t using them, but a quick online search will lead you to them.
I have been able to accomplish all of this planning in roughly a week and now we are 40 something days away from our wedding. Don’t get me wrong, it can still be stressful but it is doable! Keep in mind that everyone has their own ideas and specifics that they want for their wedding and 50 days may not be a realistic goal for them. The great thing about planning your wedding is that you plan it based off what you want, and you can literally change anything and everything to fit your vision. There are endless options and each wedding is beautiful in its own way. I know it’s the most cliché statement to make, but at the end of the day, the looks of the ceremony and pictures don’t matter, all that matters is the love between the individuals who are committing their lives and hearts to one another.
LINKS
If you would like to visit any of the sites I mentioned above, I have them linked below. I have no affiliation with these companies, I just found them helpful for our wedding.
Baltic Born Bridal Dresses: https://balticborn.com/collections/bridal
Bridesmaid Dresses: https://balticborn.com/pages/bridesmaid-looks
Canva: https://www.canva.com/
Hobby Lobby Florals and Wedding: https://www.hobbylobby.com/Floral-Wedding/c/4